Thursday, October 4, 2007

The miracle


I lost my darling papa to cancer. It crushed me completely. I was so numb that even my pain could not reach me. My father passed away so peacefully in my brother's lap, holding on to my hand, that it was difficult to look at him and think of death. He had such a wonderful smile on his face. I knew all this was for his children. He could not never bear to see us cry.He would have hated the tears so I buried them inside my heart. My mother needed all our love and support so I didn't grieve. I didn't have the time. On the sixth day of his demise all the people who knew him and loved him got together to pray for his soul and to share their grief. I left Chandigarh(my home town) that day and cried all the way to Delhi. I just couldn't stop. My papa used to tell me all the time that no one in this wide world was as Lucky as him. No one ever had a daughter as sweet as his, no one has a daughter like his and no one ever will. I was the only one. Unique . One of a kind. This phrase that he used so often kept playing on my mind. I cried for what I had lost . No one would ever tell me this. We left Chandigarh at six o'clock and reached Delhi at two in the night. I went to bed in tears. No one could console me.

When I got up the next morning there was a missed call from my mother. I immediately called her back. We spoke briefly. I didn't know how to react. A miracle was unfolding right in front of me. My mother asked me not to cry anymore. I was completely awestruck. No one had told her I was distraught for obvious reasons. How could she know my state of mind in the exact time frame! I hadn't shed a single tear all these days I was with her. She explained that during her morning meditation my father had contacted her. He was very sad as he could not bear to see me in this state. He told her he tried his best to tell me I was still his darling daughter and always would be but I couldn't hear him. In my heart I had heard him, I never understood it though. Now I realized why that one quote of his kept playing in my mind. People die. Love never dies. It stays with you forever. Only if more of us understood this.

11 comments:

Louis said...

This is so beautiful. It brought tears to my eyes.

Anuradha malik Jagdhari said...

Thank you louis. Thanks for really understanding what I ment to say and believing.

Anjali said...

couldn't stop tears rolling down. Lovely....

Anuradha malik Jagdhari said...

Thank you Anjali. Thank you....

Tharini said...

so intensely touching. I have no words to describe how i feel reading this.

petros said...

That is a real explanation of meditation and esp love . Thank you very much !

petros said...

But I would like saying sorry that you lost your wise and real(he was giving good moral for you) father ...

deepa said...

these things which many a times we experience are really miracles no science can explain this
your father must be so attached and concerned about his daughter , He sent his earnest message
can science interpret what waves had gotten in to your mother

harsha said...

October 4th is my brother's bday

Anonymous said...

Aww this brought tears to my eyes.

Pratiksha K said...

lovely